As if shaken from my sleepThe darkness around me was all I could see.
The deafening silence called out my name,
As if it was playing with me.
My heart started pounding slowly at first,
Then faster and faster it ran.
Instinctively I felt all around me
Until the beads found their way to my hand.
Tightly I clutched on to them at first,
Like a child clings hold of her mother.
Then the comforting presence embraced me
Leaving no room for the fear of another.
Blessed Alan de la Roche, who restored the devotion of the Rosary, use to be horribly persecuted by devils and sometimes deep sadness and despair would fall upon him. But our Lady always comforted him by her presence, which banished the clouds of darkness from his soul. 1
1 St. Louis de Montfort’s True Devotion Consecration to Mary, by Fr. Helmuts Libietis
Oh Holy Mother, comfort us by your presence as we meditate on the mysteries of the most Holy Rosary, the life, death and resurrection of your son, Jesus.
13 comments:
Praying the Rosary embeds the redemption story in our minds like nothing else... Having that story 'inside' of self, and feeling the beads and Crucifix, and hearing the familiar tlicktlacking sound of the beads, is weaponry at its finest. :) !
Unpleasant though they may be, the type of horrifying points of attack described in your post, are real and one must be mindful of that reality. I'm glad you've touched the topic of fear which can grip us. It's not often addressed.
Reading of it is reminiscent for me, and probably for everyone, in one way or another. Once in particular, driving at the time - praying the Rosary and concentrating ONLY on the prayer, was my sole source of distraction from such an attack, and also my source of confidence.
"Oh Holy Mother, comfort us by your presence as we meditate on the mysteries of the most Holy Rosary, the life, death and resurrection of your son, Jesus." Amen, Daily Grace.
And God bless you, I pray...
Love, love this! I sleep with a rosary, too, and am frantic when I can't find it. I read somewhere that Mother Teresa had said that when we hold a rosary in our hands, even if we are not praying with it, it is like holding Mary's hand. It is the most comforting thing I know. I am so grateful to Blessed Alan de la Roche for all that he has done for us by saving the rosary!
Amen Anne! God be with you!
Both of my daughters and I also sleep with our rosaries too. It is very comforting. I had not heard about the rosary being like holding Mary's hand, but it fits! It fits! Sometimes, I start to pray it and then my prayers go into a more conversational style of prayer, but I still want to hold on to my rosary. ☺ Maybe, now I know why! ☺
I know someone who does the same thing, searching for the Rosary in the darkness. Were it not that more people would re-discover the Rosary and pray it, to feel the "comforting presence." Peace! k
Did you write that poem?
I like it very much. Thank you for posting it.
God bless you and yours always.
Love the post, and the thought that holding the Rosary is like holding Mary's hand. Beautiful!
Thank you Victor, yes I did write the poem. I'm glad you stopped by.
God Bless
4/22/10
Just a p.s.
...to let you know I thought of you and the commenters on this post, last night. I was uneasy in an instant, inexplicably, before bedtime. All was well though - on many counts :) ! - when I took my Rosary in hand for my night's sleep...
Daily Grace,
This is a Wonderful little poem. It speaks true. It is sad in this day and age how the reality of the devil and his demons and their constant attacks upon us are not more widely known, or preached about. I have been spiritually blind for some time and because of that the devil found his way in. I only wish I had been more aware of the devil in this modern day and his attacks.
I am 27, married and have a two year old son and my wife is pregnant with our next child. I was in despair from the spiritual attacks, I wanted to leave my family, run from the thoughts, feelings, anxiety, and fear that the devil was (and still does) tempt me with. My faith that God will protect me and my family from the devil has wavered, I am sad to say this. Some days I feel confident and others not so much. But now I have turned to the Rosary and I have been praying for the intercession of our Blessed Mother Mary and her protection in these times. Things are getting better (slowly it seems) and the devil still attacks me, but I believe maybe God is breaking off the branches in me that do not bear fruit and pruning those which do that I may bear good fruits.
My wife sleeps with a Rosary, she always has since she was a little girl. I have begun to sleep with one now, it is comforting to wake up in the middle of the night and reach out for it and touch the beads, and the crucifix.
I was always taught that the Rosary was our greatest weapon. Even though my faith "feels" weak due to these spiritual attacks, I will continue to pray the Rosary. I will trust in Mary's intercession.
Please pray for me, and I will pray for you. Thank you sharing this poem. Sorry for such a long, and possibly incoherent post.
p.s. - I know in your profile you stated that the purpose of this blog is to encourage women to look for the daily graces in their everyday lives. Well even as a young man, husband, and father, I appreciate your poem. I am currently on day 11 of the Total Consecration to Jesus through Mary. Please pray for me that I will persevere and be patient and will complete this 33-day preparation. I do not know you but you are a sister in Christ, which means you are my sister. I will pray for you Daily Grace.
JHardin,
Thank you so much for visiting my blog and for sharing so much about yourself.
I have had my own spiritual attacks from the evil one too, so I understand the despair,exhaustion and emptiness that follows. You are not alone!
I would like to join you in prayer and fasting for the remainder of your Total Consecration period if you don't mind. I have calculated your 33 days to end on June 25th, am I right?
I will edit my profile to be more inclusive....Thank you for the awareness that I was not as inclusive as I should be.
God's peace be with you..
Daily Grace,
Thank you for your reply. I never meant to speak negatively about your blog profile, if I offended you, I'm sorry.
June 25th will be the date of my Consecration. I would deeply appreciate you joining me in prayer and fasting.
I admit that I currently do not practice fasting. My wife encourages me to do others forms of fasting, but she worries about my health if I only eat bread and drink water. I can gladly fast breakfast and lunch on bread and water but during dinner she has asked that I eat the dinner she prepares with our family. I can only hope that if I choose this way to fast it will still have the same effect and merit as though I fasted for all 3 meals.
Ever since I have come under this particular spiritual attack I have prayed and tried to be more active in my faith. At first I despaired and had thoughts of dying, or leaving my family, I couldn't figure out why I was under this attack and what I could do about it. I became very depressed and anxious, and I gave in to self-pity. I felt helpless. I confided all in my wife, but I have left doubt and fear in her heart (it is human nature, I can't change that I put that seed of fear in her, I can only pray that God will pluck it out of her heart by its root). I have turned to God now and Mary and praying the Rosary, and I pray every day to be victorious in this battle.
All of this shook my being and my faith to its very core. Thanks be to God by His will and I believe by the intercession of The Blessed Mother Mary, my mother, I have gained ground in this situation. But I've been allowed to see how weak I am and how much I need God and all the avenues of grace he provides. I have a family that I love. I am a husband, and father. For my marriage, and my family I need to courageously fight the devil and abandon myself completely to God's divine will.
I tell you all of this because I want you to know your prayers and fasting are needed and will be truly appreciated.
One last question though, and this is just a matter of curiosity. During your 33 day preparation did you ever find yourself under a strong spiritual attack that you can recall? Anything that almost caused you not to complete the 33 days up to the Consecration?
And God's peace be with you also.
JHardin,
I was not offended at all regarding the profile talk. I actually felt that God was saying "Okay now, men read this too, lets make an adjustment". It made me smile!
Regarding fasting, there are many forms of fasting and if you have health issues or take any medications , ect., that is understandable. Focus on what you can do and pray for a strong faith and a firm will.
You asked me if I had spiritual attacks during my 33 day period of preparation for consecration, the answer is YES. My biggest attacks came in the form of anxiety and a deep sense of unworthiness. You see, I am no saint. In fact, I am very human. I wanted to be perfect and felt that if I couldn't be perfect I was only fooling myself by trying to complete this preparation.
But God knows me better than I know myself and He let me know in no uncertain terms that He came for the imperfect and not the perfect!
Everyday I am like St. Paul when he said "Why do I keep on doing the things I hate?". And look JH at how he used St. Paul!!!! Hope is from God, fear is from Satan, I choose God because He first chose me! After all He formed me in the womb! He formed you too!
Peace my friend!
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